Sorry!

Sorry, Entschúldigung, آسف  (hopefully ‘sorry’ in Arabic),

I know, I know, I didn’t send the update out like normal last week.

I should really just get Dr Robert, Bob's AI Avatar to automate these emails through Chat GPT, but I feel it is important we humanise Bob and ensure that we are authentic. Well, it doesn’t get more British and authentic than being fashionably late.

It was an interesting debate on Thursday when I had to put my hands up and apologise to Will and Max for not drafting last week's update in time. At the heart of the debate was the unknown answer as to whether anyone would actually notice, or care, that this email update for last week was late. The debate resulted in us putting a one-pound bet between the founders and if I had the energy, I’d add a poll to this email to settle the bet, but I don’t, so won’t.

So, in your mind, just decide which of the following statements aligns best with you. And then go and put the spare penny change in the charity jar when you next buy a Pret coffee. 

Scenario 1: Will was really peed off because we didn’t deliver on time. Will feels everyone will be annoyed. Are you annoyed? Especially if you are one of our efficient German followers?

Scenario 2: Max had his head down so he didn’t notice, then he went camping in the rain, he thinks no one will notice. Did you even notice?

Scenario 3: And then there’s me. Well given it was my bad for being late, I naturally argued that I planned it, as it perfectly reflects Bob and the community we are trying to build. Men, who give their all, every day, and no matter how exhausted, will always smile. Will always show up come rain or shine, even if they are a little late to the party from time to time.

(If you agree with scenario 3, me, then all I ask is that you share this email with your mates to spread the word of Bob, and I promise to give you all at least a 10% discount on our normal pricing when we launch on Kickstarter in a few months time…😜).

So for those who are running late like me, and only have two mins to catch up on our incredibly busy week, here’s a summary of last week (thank you to Louis, a dear friend of mine, for your wonderful feedback). Louis would like a more structured approach to the email; Tell us what you're gonna tell us, tell us, then tell us what you told us. Like BBC News at 2200. Louis, I wouldn’t bother reading past the first two bullet points below. I’ll sort a better structure next week when I have time 😉;

Last week’s progress/mess/excitement/updated;

• Our soap turned up in a random pharmacy/post office in the depths of South London. Now received.
• We tested our first prototype rigs in the shower (I had 32 showers last week. I’m not joking. I’m like a prawn).
• We can’t believe how good our first formulation of soap actually is. It smells great, foams like fook, and leaves me feeling very clean (even the wife tried it and liked it)
• We gave beta feedback and they have built five more rigs (something about making a French press coffee and frothing it like that. I’ve no idea what they are on about, but signed it off)
• Josh Shires, Bob investor and founder of MOUS, took some soap home to test and made a joke about him hoping his bits and bobs wouldn’t fall off (Josh, here is your disclaimer and by reading this email you take full responsibility of your testing. We take no responsibility for any bits or bobs falling off during early testing phases)
• Max designed our whole new brand and website in 32 hours, with 54 eco cigarettes, and no sleep (I am working on the content this week and super excited to see it all come together so quickly).
• We secured £50k from one UAE investor! (Did I mention this last week? Can’t remember, but it’s now signed and sealed).
• I sent Halim (our first UAE investor) two videos of me in the shower showing him how the soap foams and the product tests (not sure if it was a cultural difference or the fact that he opened my videos whilst at an important lunch meeting with his female colleague that made it so awkward. Either way, I wish I could share the voice note he sent me after. FUNNY)
• Max attended a virtual pre-pitch day, as I was double booked pitching in the regional final of Britain’s Got Startups.
• Oh yeh, I actually nailed the Britain’s Got Startups regional final pitch. I'm not normally one to blow my own Bob (imagine if you could, no stop, stay on track), but I actually was very happy with my pitch. I did a little dance after it, I was that happy - bit embarrassing but it did show I was human, and it meant a lot to me nailing it in front of 48 potential investors.
• I even cut up some soap for investors and wrapped it in a tissue (nothing like getting feedback on the fly / looking like the lead character in Breaking Bad, whilst slicing up white blocks and giving it out to people).

• We are now gearing up for a Kickstarter launch over the next couple of months and super excited to be working with the Crowd Academy boys. (The title of the agreement is: Let’s deliver the best F*&king Kickstarter campaign the world has ever seen. Bit crude from me as a title, but it set the bar high and they understood the assignment, and my expectations). 
• Oh, and I now have a very little rash, let's hope it's not one of the test soap formulations. Currently investigating if it's a rogue ingredient teasing my super sensitive skin, or whether the 32 test showers last week, rubbing 3D printed silicon on my Bob, has worn him down a little. (Josh see bullet point 5 buddy). Also, this is a good thing at this early stage, as we are so obsessed with creating the perfect product for us (and of course you), that we need to make sure every part of Bob and our Bob Bar is tested to its absolute limits. We will not be launching until it is perfect. 

Still with me Louis, or have I lost you mate?

All of this while Will is in Florida upside down on a Harry Potter ride at Universal Studios, sending Max and I 30 minute check-ins to ensure we are completing the operational tasks we had planned this week.

In all seriousness, Will, we miss you. It’s carnage, there’s no order and operations have gone to sh*t. 

When are you back again?

Next week the list of jobs include:

• Complete v1 draft of new brand and website - get feedback 
• Keep testing the new soap to make sure we don’t get a rash on our bits and bobs
• Test the new prototypes to see if it acts like a french press coffee frother
• Get some money in the bank cos we are running out of it fast.
• Restore order and some form of Operations
• Plan out our Kickstarter roadmap to launch. 

Late addition 

OH MY GOD, where do I ADD THIS, I don’t know, I’m too excited. Thought I’d managed to finish the draft, but this update can’t wait!

SOOO, I can now confirm that 3 people actually read these email updates (Louise Will’s mum, Louis and a new person) This new person is actually one of the most successful and exciting entrepreneurs I have had the privilege of meeting 10 years ago. In a previous business I founded, this gentleman was almost one of our early investors, but unfortunately, it didn't quite align for us all at the time. 10 years on, who’d of thought it, but quietly behind the scenes he has been reading these updates and monitoring Bob’s progress!

So much so that he has pledged £100K on Friday morning. A quick LinkedIn message, followed by a 30-minute call, whilst searching for a co-op meal deal, we confirmed a £100k investment into Bob!! Magical, just Magical.

Safe to say I had a couple of beers on Friday night and fell asleep in the pub. (Sorry to the 4 friends I was with, I can assure you it wasn’t your chat, I had just had a busy week. Promise). 

Anyway, that’s enough for playing catch up, it’s now only 4 days till your next update as I need to get the timing back on track this week. 

Call to Action

Finally, my commercial mentor keeps getting mad at me and telling me I need to add a call to action to these emails, so here goes;

1. Copy. Paste. This link - https://welcometobob.com/pages/join-our-waiting-list
2. Then stick it in all your WhatsApp groups and tell your mates when they ask, that Bob is the new Snapchat or TikTok for soap, and they should join the waiting list so as not to miss out. 

Much love,

Bob 

P.S. The meal deal I went for was a prawn sandwich, salt and vinegar crisp, and an innocent strawberry and banana smoothie, just in case you were curious about what I was buying whilst securing a £100k investment check. Haha, just mad isn’t it?